I have set the Lord always before me; *
because he is at my right hand I shall not fall.
My heart, therefore, is glad, and my spirit rejoices; *
my body also shall rest in hope.
For you will not abandon me to the grave, *
nor let your holy one see the Pit.
You will show me the path of life; *
in your presence there is fullness of joy,
and in your right hand are pleasures for evermore. (Psalm 16: 8-11)
In her wonderful book Help, Thanks, Wow: The Three Essential Prayers by Anne Lamott, you can find this prayer:
Hi, God.
I am just a mess.
It is all hopeless.
What else is new?
I would be sick of me, if I were You, but miraculously you are not.
Yet I believe that if I accept this and surrender, You will meet me wherever I am.
Wow. Can this be true? If so, how is this afternoon-say two-ish?
Thank you in advance for Your company and blessings.
You have never let me down.
Amen[1]
In our reading today from John’s Gospel, the disciples have gathered in fear behind locked doors. We are told they are in hiding unable to believe that the man they chose to give their lives to, to abandon their jobs, families and now, apparently, their safety for, has been killed by the religious and governmental authorities. It wasn’t supposed to be like this! What had been done to Jesus was something that they feared might be their fate, so now they are laying low–lost, confused, vulnerable. And this is where the risen Christ meets them, stands among them, offers them his peace, shows them his broken body, and breathes God’s Spirit on them. The Gospel writer tells us that there was great rejoicing.
But one of the disciples was not present. Thomas missed this opportunity to see Jesus. He wasn’t gone long. He had just stepped out. Just this one time he misses a meeting and now he hears that Jesus has come to be with the others. Thomas, the one who was willing to follow Jesus to his death, will not accept a second-hand witness. He needs the chance to see for himself his beloved teacher who has been crucified.
A week later, we are told that Jesus comes back. This time Thomas is present with the other disciples. Jesus again enters through a closed door, shares his peace, and then immediately offers Thomas the chance to see and touch his wounded body—his scarred hands and pierced side. We are not told whether Thomas actually touches Jesus’s scars, but we hear that he responds in recognition, “my Lord and my God.”
During these 40 days of Easter between Christ’s resurrection and his ascension, we hear stories of Jesus coming to his followers, meeting them where they are, offering himself in love and tenderness. Showing them that death has not defeated his love and that his mercy will continue “imperishable, undefiled, and unfading” (1 Peter 4).
Mary is lost in grief and searches steadfastly for the body that she had witnessed being placed in the tomb. She does not understand the message of the angels, but when the risen Christ speaks her name, she recognizes her beloved One. Coming to Mary he gives her the opportunity to hear her shepherds’ voice and believe. It is then that she goes to tell the other disciples that she “has seen the Lord.”
Today Jesus comes to frightened and secluded disciples. Despite Jesus telling them over and over that he was to be arrested and crucified and then was to rise again—despite the witness of Mary Magdalene—they cannot understand and so face a fearful future. But even through locked doors, fearful hearts, distrustful minds, Jesus comes to them. He offers them peace “shalom” the peace that passes understanding, the peace that bursts through the boundaries of death, the peace that promises new life. This peace Jesus brings, borne by a body that knows great suffering. Coming to these frightened disciples, Jesus gives them the opportunity to see and believe. In his presence the disciples experience restored hope and boundless joy.
And then, the risen One comes to Thomas, right where he is. Thomas tells his community that he must see the mark of the nails in Jesus’ hands and reach into his lacerated side. Thomas cannot believe the goodness of this truth. Thomas longs for his own experience of the risen Christ. Thomas longs to experience Jesus for himself. Without hesitation, Jesus offers the confirmation, the sign, Thomas needs. Being the one who meets us where we are—Jesus comes to Thomas and gives him the opportunity to touch and believe.
Thomas’ confession, “My Lord and my God!” is the only time that Jesus is called God in the four Gospels. Thomas sees Jesus not only as the world’s great God incarnate, he has experienced Jesus as his Lord and his God the one who cares enough for Thomas to meet him specifically.
And then Jesus opens the door for all the rest of us. Jesus says to Thomas, “You have believed because you have seen me.” And then he turns and says, “Blessed are you who have not seen and yet have come to believe.” Those in John’s community and those of us today who were not witnesses to the crucifixion, the empty tomb, or the risen and scarred body, seek an experience of the risen Christ. We long for an experience of Jesus. Jesus who envelopes us in love. Jesus who stands beside us in times of trial–Jesus who comes to us when we feel no one else can hear our cries. Jesus who brings us joy and splendor beyond measure– who opens for us a life that is abundant. Jesus who inspires us and strengthens us to enter in to God’s plan for this fiercely troubling and fiercely beautiful world.
Jesus does not let us down. Jesus comes to us today right where we are, just as he did with Mary, Thomas, and the other disciples. Jesus comes to us in as many ways as there are people who seek him. He comes to us in the still quiet places in our lives and in the midst of the glorious reverie of a family dinner or night out with dear friends. Jesus comes to us when we cannot take one more cold dark day and Jesus surprises us with an astonishing sunlit morning. Jesus shows us the way to God through someone who deeply listens to our stories, offers us the kindness of a loaf of bread, brings us a gentle touch when life feels at a distance, and opens us to hope in the countless moments of wonder that can surface in our daily lives. Jesus appears again and again, coming to us in beauty and joy, disappointment, and grief, coming to where ever we are– to unlock doors that lead from death to life, from fear to hope.
One of the best ways we can experience Jesus’ presence is in the company of each other. Every time we gather here to listen to our ancient truths in the words of scripture, to engage in the deep presence of prayer, to share God’s shalom with each other, to gather at the table of thanksgiving, each as we are, no boundaries or conditions, to take into our bodies the living presence of God’s love for us all, we are met by the risen One. When we come together as the resurrected body of Christ, we become together what we could never be alone. Jesus comes to us as we are, loving us without measure, holding out his own body that knows intimately both the joys and the suffering we experience. And then offers us the peace of God, breathes new life into us, and then sends us out into our world to share what we have seen, what we have touched, what we believe has given us life.
I love the writing of Anne Lamott. I can find myself in her humanness and I rejoice in her dogged determination that the world is filled with good because the God who comes to her, meeting her where she is, is good. I love the idea that the risen glorious Christ is the One to whom I can say, “Hi! It’s me. I need your help. I am so grateful, I am just amazed at all that is here for me to receive and to share.” “Thank you for that sunset!” Help my precious friend.” I could really use your help here!” I love the idea that no matter where we are, who we are, what we need, the always responding One, in whose company we dwell and from whom all blessings flow, really listens, really cares. That no matter the day or hour, the fortress I put up, the rawness of my plea—really responds.
“I just need to be with you Jesus. To touch you, feel you, see you, hear you, taste you. One more time. I need to feel that abiding peace again, I need to feel the way, again. One more time.”
In this glorious time of Easter, we are blessed with a God who cannot be stopped by locked doors of doubt, or grief, or fear, or busyness or even death. God knows our need for his presence and so continues to come to us, blessing us, giving us unexpected pure uninhibited love, filling us with hope. May we never be afraid to ask, never be afraid to reach out, never be afraid to touch the place of suffering. The Good News of the gospel is that Jesus is always near. May we who seek his presence, be filled with the breath of God that brings us life in God’s name.
Hi God! Thank you in advance for your company and your blessings. Amen
[1] Anne Lamott. Help, Thanks, Wow: The Three Essential Prayers. New York: Riverhead Books, 2012, 34.